Monday, November 14, 2005

trying my hardest

i'm trying my hardest, really.
trying to hold back those naive tears
that don't need to roll down my cheeks
cheeks you used to pinch
those you used to hold near
and hopefully dear to you.

i'm trying my hardest, really.
trying to understand what really went wrong
me being clueless half the time isnt helping
i know.
and here's your space, to fully
gather your life back together

i'm trying my hardest, seriously.
to not look sad, because thats not what you need
i'm trying to stay happy, because after all
you've created so many memories
that i can look back on and smile
and maybe even a little smirk could appear

i'm trying my hardest, seriously
trying to fully comprehend
what goes on in that heart, mind and soul of yours
you used to share, but now almost seems
foreign and yet i still want to befriend
for you said i'd be able to keep you

i'm trying my hardest, definitely.
to hold on to that heart i stole
remembering that i never wanted to give it back
if only i was still that selfish
there's so much in store for you
and you deserve the best, nothing less

i'm trying my hardest, definitely.
to finally grasp the reality that's hit me
that you're just merely one of the greatest people out there
who need your space and time to prioritize
those and things who really matter
and nevertheless i'm glad youre still here

together or not.
i still care about you just as much
and i'll treat you just as right
cuz you'll always be,
my sunshine in the rain
my turkey pie
my knight in shining armor
my seth when i'm miriam
my clyde when i'm bonnie
my nathan cuz i'm still rachel

and then there's you trying
hopefully living life to its fullest
because i've always reminded you to
carpe diem

there's you trying to reach your goals
and i believe you'll reach your highest
because i know you know what you want
and what you need
and 'til that day. keep soul searching
for your demanded answers
never settling for less

again, there's you in the midst of this
chaotic world full of sin, but who isnt?
and i'm earnestly hoping for whatever
situation you're in, to be sorted out
and i'm always praying for you, just like
you used to request me to do
no matter how unbelievable it seems
no matter how far away this God
we're supposedly believing is
always hoping for the best

because there's me, and hopefully you
believing in happy endings