:(

why are these things so grrr? i wanna go chillies with ay-ers. but i also wanna chillies at mtee's. and i also dont want my mom being pissie at me. so far shes the only one wanting me for new year's at my fams. siiiighs. shall i do eenie meenie miney mo? or shall i... dot dot dot. i dont wanna go to mtee's for the whole day, but i still wanna go. i wanna go with ay-ers for the whole day, but i dont wanna let my mom down. aaaahhhhh kiill me with decisions

4 words: i miss hong kong :(

hellooooo hottaaayyyy

my hot ones.


sam chan


jay chou


edison chen


won bin


jesse mccartney


aaron carter


hayden christensen

tides

that's it. confirmed that there's been over 100 000 dead because the of tsunami. people are homeless. reading the news that people are looking for their loved ones. like this 7 year old swedish kid cant find his parents, and its in thailand too. i'm gonna break down into tears. too bad my tears arent gonna do anything. prayer is power. so now, i'm gonna prayy. ahhaha after you see this.


i'm that cool that curtis had to draw a picture of our conversation. LOL

i'm a lucky ducky

:( i dont like these tragedies. like wow, natural disasters are tooooooo much. earthquakes, hurricanes and now the asian tsunami. the world IS coming to an end. all the revelational prophecies are coming true. i dont know how we can cope with everything. like just a while ago, the farmer that lost his family of a wife and 8 kids. and it all calls for trust and knowing who to turn to in times of struggles. i know that God knows what He's doing but ahhh, so much at once.

i remember watching i think it was the late show with david letterman. and he basically introduced this guy on his show who was born with no elbows and no knees, so he had no lower arms and legs. and it's kinda sad because he has a pretty good looking face too. lol, but i'm so amazed by his optimism, he kept his spirits high. he plays sports like hockey football and even wrestling. it amazes me so much a person with no elbows and knees could do all that. he's even a motivational speaker AND he has a girlfriend. i really admire him, but too bad i dont remmeber his name.

if all these things happened to me, it would kill my day and days to follow, but it dint. i've never had all those things happen to me, and yet i'm complaining about how school sucks or how cold it is or how i cant go out as i dont have a ride. the things i'm complaining about could never compare to the things that have happened to the thousands of others that are having a more miserable life than me. and i've come to the conclusion that i'm gonna make the best out of everything instead of complaining. thats another one of my new years resolutions.

to the rest of you out there, you all are lucky ducks, to be sitting here reading my blog, eating, living. Jesus loves you, really.

year 2k4 flashback

i must say, its been an eventful year. though not everything was good it still did contribute to my memory of 2004. but i'm not gonna name the bad ones. here's a list in chronological order from my memory. if i forgot something, you shall inform me :)

• the typical countdown
• fmp with josh, nat, kit, ron, kar
• josh's house for our gang5tarz
• jen's house
• my house
• laughing spasms with joeeyyyyyyy
• hong kong
• my birthday
• spring retreat
• wonderland
• zion grad
• doncrest
• pheebs' early birthday mall trip
• sna
• volleyball
• chandos
• richard's house (jitz pool laughs) then cooking with char and kar
• jen's birthday hangout (karaoke movie food)
• halloween
• the multiple movies and mall trips i've taken with you guys
• my cousins coming
• mishs house (mahjong, laughing at kai, cards and more laughs)

more to come, as this year aint over. just a few days left. i'll miss 2004. we're growing up way too fasttttttt.

le jour de boxing

boxing day. i always look forward to that day. sooo, after many fussinesses from my younger siblings, i finally got to a place where i was SO in the mood to shop. and i start walkin, and omword its like crazy filled with people i thought i was about to suffocate cuz i couldnt walk. but hey, yet again i manage to go someplace where i know someone. ahhaha and lookie lookie. exactly a year later on boxing day, in the exact same mall i see one of my besties: jo. toooo badd she didnt give me the reaction that made us crack up. like boxing day 2003 was "EEEEE!!!" *waves hands in the air and runs to give rachel a hug* hahaha this year was *tap rachel hard on the head* and say hey. lol n then she leaves to go find vanessa. ditchaaarrr. and wow it was so weird cuz i saw MISHHHHH n then i saw steph. like happiness maannn. i think my shopping day would have gone so much better if it was just me and my mom, like seriously, sibs were like whining everyywheree :((((. and stupid forks and see lai's kept pushing me to get their way, i was like MANNERS LADIES. *sighs* but i got these lounge boxers (gotta love em), socks (fetish for em now), sweaterrr (ooo, makes me feel nice), headset for my cam radio, disney cd (jesse mccartney, aaron carter and stevie brock is what i'm talking about; funny how the 3 of them look like triplets almost). i love my christmas presents mann, when i was opening em yesterday i was like mmmm i love my relatives. oh and right, aaron gave me a kinder bueno ahhah. well after i leave my place of suffocation (stc), i go to see my cute gramma and eat dinner there. i love to see her and hug her and mmm. she makes me laugh. hehehehe. nehoosers, nightie nights.

off the hills

i'm so saddened. today was my last day of snowboarding, and i finally mastered doing it properly. now i long to be back on the slopes again :( it was cool. oh well i still have the rest of the season right? anyways its christmas now :) happy birthday Jesus like wow. oh and happy birthday JO :) anyways i went to the christmas service at church only to find that everyone i knew went to the english service and there i was in the chinese service. lol kinda weird cuz i was with all these see lai's and old people. oh well, it was still cool though. the speaker was really interesting, and to think it was in chinese. well, i hope you all are having an awesome break. merry christmas and happy new year :))))

the ugly letdown

well then. 15 cm of snow huh? got snowed in today, cuz there was so much flippin snow the car wouldnt drive out of my driveway. i was super bummed, cuz i was lookin forward to hittin the slopes once again to try to perfect my boarding "skillz". and so one day wasted away at home where i could be on the hills in the lovely white snow. pooeyyy. and if only i knew i wouldnt be able to go today, i would have stayed at mish's house longer. grr. oh yeah i forgot to add in some stuff yesterday like me laughing at jaychan's broken arm and him ordering pizza for me cuz i felt so stupid. hahah and i almost set the house on fire cuz i accidentally put the plastic bag on top of the candleflame n then after that it smelled like burning. loll lalla k, i've officially let aa go as of today, and to whoever's reading this. hold me accountable. :) blog later....

:)))

i'm so in a blogging mood today. and i had that spur of the moment depression. well, after all hte lecturing from my parents, they finally let me go to mish's house. and oh man, it made me oh so happy. hahaha jay chuey and i kept having laughing spasms over nothing funny at all aka kai.n then we like play mahjong, ahhaah i felt so stupid cuz i wasnt fast enough. n then we like play cards, ahhaa so jokes. cuz kai kept staring at me. HARHARHAR n then mish sucked on her toes and then sebi had to drink a narsty "concoction". hahah tim never talked. char kept doing pig for me. *sighs* cant wait til i chill with you guys agaiiinnn. oh and what sucks was that me & tian keep missing each other. i was boarding when they were having lunch and tian was there n then i went to mishs house, n then right when im driving away i see tian walking to mish's house >=[ nehoww. more boarding tomoro, im happy im improving, just veryyyy slooooooowlllyy. okay well good nightios

cds

just a lil shoutout to curt before i start ranting :) -- thannkss a million x infinity

i have a huge craze for cds right now. well i always did but now im like...longing for them. lol if you'd like to make my day(s) there will be a list of how. mwarharhahar

1. chris tomlin arriving
2. hillsong for all you've done
3. ryan cabrera true
4. jesse mccartney beautiful soul
5. destiny's child destiny fulfilled
6. jessica simpson in this skin

thanks and haf a velly velly great day :)

..

today's the day when i feel depressive and i feel like breaking down cuz no one's making me truly happy.

ishhhhhhhhh

i've found that, no matter how hard i try i'm never going to please everyone. and throughout my life, there've been so many people influences, not all of them were good but thankfully most of them were worthwhile. i used to complain a lot and i prolly still do, just not as much only because it makes me miserable as well as the person i'm complaining to. and i've noticed that each person has their own way of living, good or bad its their life. for the past few months, struggles and all, i found the people who cared and let me know they always will. growin up isnt easy, but i want to make my younger years worth living so i wont regret when i'm actually an adult and look back at how much i wasted my life. i've used the computer less, and as a human we're prone to comparing ourselves with others, so i'm trying to stop that since it's a stupid thing to do anyways. i used to be superficial, but now i'm more practical. and my goal now is to be the best person i can be so maybe in the future someone would eventually look up to me. people have no need for critics becuase what they need are models. oh and to those who waste their life away in negativity, have fun spazzing it doesnt take you anywhere.

i'm so proud of the ppl at rhfmc who got baptized, though it was jokes cuz you guys ARE jokes, baptism is supposed to be serious! thanks a million to the ho family and mishhh. love you lots :) anyways went boarding today for the first time in 4 years. ahahah i think im getting the hang of it. fell too many times though. i need a masseuse for the pains in my buttocks that im gonna get. oh and just a lil endnote: i smell so good i could date, no, MARRY myself. mwarharharharhar. good nite buddieessssss

2005 resolutions

1. obtain at least a 90 average, or maintain a 85+ if not
2. get a job i enjoy doing
3. get tlc's clean sweep to do my house
4. grow stronger in Christ
5. snowboard
6. get electric acoustic guitar
7. not let worthwhile things get in the way of me bein happy
8. have those people around me continue to enjoy having my company
9. volunteer at senior homes, hospitals or scott mission
10. be patient with my family members

w00t, schools OUT

mwarharharhar, today was a good day i think :) stress free for two weeeeeks. YAAAAY. anyways, went to school today. all you make me smile :) you guys know who you are. i feel so broke right now, using my NEW CRISP bills haha from chinese new year like MONTHS ago, but thats okay, theres another one for me to look forward to! anyways, wow i think toronto is a small world, liane will and kev at eatons. ahhaha n then us avoiding seeing robert and matthias. anyways, still need to get prezzies im not a good person in getting ppl what they want. :S from eaton centre to yorkdale. it was okay, kinda scary cuz there were so many gangsters there. lol but then we watched ocean's twelve. i didnt understand what the beginning was talking about so i kinda like dozed off a lil, then it started to be okay as i put the puzzle pieces together with pheebs. haha it coulda been a better movie, but i cant really complain. and now im really tired. gotta meet up with my loveloves again n see my chandos-ers and ay-ers. and you, if you really wanna meet up. haha oh and curt & stan: i didnt get you anything, but here you can have a christmas hug, usually its really expensive but since im so nice, you can have it for free :) haha merry christmas, kiddoooooooss

kill me

school stinks like a garbage dump >=[ tests, projects. holy crap, one at a time people. christmas break would be a greeeeat way to cool down for me. lol n then we go back to school again, homework projects and EXAMS n then i wish for march break. hope itll be alll good by then. oh well gonna stop complainin about school. just some food for thought:

isn't it stupid how in public schools, the talk about Christianity is restricted but yet every other religion isnt held back? isnt it stupid how if you say a word, let's say CHRISTMAS, that it would offend someone. like HOW SO? so therefore public school teachers arent allowed to say the word CHRISTMAS cuz it might offend someone. like WHO? NO ONE FLIPPIN CARES. grrr, hahaha they let the muslim faith or jewish or watever religion there is go on with their lives, becuase if they start holding restrictions, theyre gonna do their rioting where as Christians are calm sensible people. you would think they'd be used to being held back from practicing their faith. anyways. not really food for thought but aahhh its stupid still...

a sense of belonging

its always nice to know you belong somewhere. whether it be your school, church or wherever else you tend to be. earlier this year, i felt i couldnt fit in and i felt like life was just stupid. but obviously theres more that meets the eye. now i've opened myself to new things instead of dwelling on the old ones. i've found that i've prejudged my church in the way that i shouldnt, but now i know that church could be my fam after all. school, it's still all the same, cant really complain. but God's helped me to find where i belong temporarily. :) i love You